Mango Man

“Priorities are Quite Clear when one is fearing Death.”

It was clear to us that if the walls and ceiling gave away then we were trapped and if panic sets in and the crowd starts running to the exit it could also lead to a stampede…

By Neha Rathi

I was in Nepal for a workshop and was in one of the sessions on child marriage on the third day that the first big earthquake hit. I had taken a bathroom break and had just pulled the washroom door handle to open it when lights went out and earth began to shake. The kinds that can toss you around. Trying to walk in complete darkness I made my way towards the corridor where I hoped others would be. A colleague was taking cover by a wall and I held on to him as he held on to another person. They had thought it was a terrorist attack and that someone was bombing the building. But soon it was clear to us that it was in fact a very big earthquake and leaving everything else within the same second I ran for my life as I feared that the building will collapse. With all the energy I could muster I screamed and ran to get to the door that opened to the lawns outside. As we did that stones and cement blocks started to fall from the building but the mind knew one had to run to save one’s life. In uncertainty and panic I also did just that. Those split seconds are an unclear memory to me. I only remember screaming at the top of my voice and running towards the exit. My colleagues tell me my screaming ‘run run’ helped them get a sense of what was happening and they also sprinted for the exit. Finally assembled on the lawn and sprawled on our stomach with our palms trying to balance ourselves. Strong tremors and aftershocks continued till long after and more and more guests from the hotel ran out. We were now cut off from the internet and phone lines.

We were asked not to be on those lawns as it was still close to the building. The hotel staff was injured and especially the kitchen staff had suffered cuts and bled profusely. We were asked to walk to the tennis courts and stay there. We camped out in the open for the next six hours as the staff tried to bring to us whatever they could find to eat and water. Those injured were soon treated. The tremors continued but we were safe. At one point of time the staff went on to get all the cakes and pastries or ready food they could find since we had been out for a long time now.

At around six it started to get cold and it seemed it would rain. The Manager of the Hotel made an announcement that we may shift to the lobby of the hotel. We made our way back to the lobby where for the first time we assessed the situation. Many walls and ceilings had cracked open. The ground was split at places and tiles had come off. The hotel staff had tried to remove some debris and was most helpful and patient. We still did not know the extent of damage outside and could only speculate. Initially we heard that 300 people are dead in Kathmandu and that Dharahari was destructed along with Bhaktapur Durbar Square – both places I was hoping to visit the next day.

Now in hotel, we stayed in the lobby and the staff of the hotel announced that if we want we could go into the rooms though they discouraged it. They said we could go and get any essential stuff we needed and to come back asap. I needed my charger so I also went upstairs and packed some essentials in a bag pack and rushed. I realised I should not have gone to the room alone. The staircases the corridors were all damaged somewhat with big cracks on walls. It was very scary esp as aftershocks kept occurring every hour. Somehow I returned back and frantically tried to call home. Finally some internet and I was able to send some messages and post on Facebook that I was safe. The staff soon laid a table and some food was served that the guests made a queue to take in paper plates. There must have been around 400 ppl there. Everyone was hungry and tired and lined up for the food.

Realising that sleeping won’t be easy we again went up to the room – this time with two colleagues to get blankets and pillows and all of our other luggage. The mini bar was also raided, of course. The blankets were used both as mattress and for covering us. The tremors continued some big some small but with each tremor we felt the worst would happen now.

Though we tried to catch some sleep but it was difficult because of the motion sickness that we all felt. It is not possible to really take a nap when you have to be prepared to run out any moment.

Around midnight some of us decided that sleeping out in the lawn on grass would be a better as we would then not have to run for safety. But we had hardly slept on the lawns when strong after shocks started again and at times I did not know if it was my mind playing games but then the birds started hooting and dogs howled and each time they did that it was a mark of a quake. Very soon it started to rain and with all our luggage – bags, bagpacks, pillows and blankets we made our way back to the lobby which was far, given how exhausted we were. All this while I tried to call or send another message across but network services were not available. News of deaths and destruction was reaching us with reports that more earthquakes are expected. Now and then the internet would work for five minutes and we would all try to send across messages in that time. They had already created a group on whatsapp and were sharing information about me on it. While trying to sleep and at the same time remaining alert many big tremors occurred lasting for 2-3 seconds shaking everything in the lobby, crying children and distressed parents. With each aftershock people would wake up harried and would jump up and start running towards the exit only to realise it is over and we should stay put. Panic. The mind and the body took it but it left a deep fear the sort that thrives in uncertainty.

We spent the next morning trying to work out ways to reach the airport for our different flights. Cab service was down but luckily we found something. I and four others left at 12:30 for the airport as news about another predicted earthquake came in. The guests and the staff were all asked to come out and again take shelter in the lawns. We did that but then left for the airport which was chaotic, choked and by now complete mess by the looks of it. We finally got into a snail-paced queue for check in and were in the middle of the queue when the second quake took place. Some staff members from different airlines left their seats and ran away. This one left me terrified. In the few seconds that we had the mind and heart both rushed. It was clear to us that if the walls and ceiling gave away then we were trapped and if panic sets in and the crowd starts running to the exit it could also could lead to a stampede. In both scenarios I was sure there was no way we could reach any exit given the rush. I was with three senior colleagues – two of them were Americans and one Indian. As the tremors began we tried to stand still holding on to our luggage as the building and people swayed and a few seconds later the lights went out. Some passengers panicked and ran for the exit. My heart was fearful and beating hard. There was nowhere to run at the small airport. Priorities are quite clear when one is fearing death. I called up home but it didn’t connect after repeatedly trying. I left a message on my notes in the phone it read “I love you all”. Finally, I tried calling Pranav feeling a silent panic and sadness taking over and asked him to tell everyone esp my family that I love them. I did not have it in me to take names. I did feel in those few seconds it ‘could’ soon be all over. But then the tremors subsided and I was finally able to speak to my sister Niharika and my mom. A European passenger standing in a parallel queue at a distance saw me trying to hide my tears from behind my spectacles. He silently gestured to me that all will be fine. I nodded and smiled back. Such small gestures from random strangers had been happening all this time and made a lot of difference.

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Finally, we got our boarding passes and went through the security check. By the looks of it seemed that all flights etc had been suspended and Kathmandu airport might not be operational for the day. Thousands of passengers were stranded. We went out the boarding gates where more people were to be found sitting on the ground. Hungry and confused. The waiting lounge was more than full and now people were sitting out in the open near the runway. It was there when we saw a huge Indian Air Force plane which we heard had just landed. A lot of confusion then began about whether we could board this plane and if they would allow us (those with baggage checked-in in other flights) to board. A colleague of mine spoke to some officers and they assured her that everyone would be taken on board. That gave us some relief.

After waiting in a queue that started from the aircraft and tailed its way and being unsure for another seven(!) hours we were finally allowed to board at 7:30. The injured, the elderly and the children were given preference. Women and men followed. We boarded the aircraft and around 325 people were accommodated with most sitting on the spiked floor on the plane. The Air Force officers were considerate and tried to accommodate as many passengers as possible. Some instructions and an hour and a half later we finally arrived in Delhi. My luggage is still in Nepal and hopefully I will receive it soon. It still feels that the earth is shaking and I’m dehydrated. I hope normalcy is restored in Nepal and more and more strangers take it upon themselves to help and comfort one another.

(Rathi is a human rights lawyer with the Supreme Court.)

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